GR

Age: 30-64

Occupation: Entrepreneur

Growing up, GR’s hair was considered “good hair.” She wore it straight. As an adult, she began to wear it curly from time to time. Now, she wears her hair curly more often because her ten-year-old daughter has very curly hair, and GR wants to build her daughter’s comfort with her hair.

“Her hair is phenomenal; she has the coolest hair in the family, but she didn’t see it that way,” GR said of her daughter. “She was going to schools where she was the only one who was black, or of one or two kids. She would see the other kids’ hair, and she really wanted her hair to be straight or blonde or red based on what the other kids around her looked like. It took a while for us to get her to be comfortable with her own hair, and her own skin tone to be honest.”

When it was time to send her daughter to elementary school, GR intentionally sent her to a school with a greater number of Black students. She enrolled her in a public school with a fairly large Black population, which “made all the difference.” Her daughter saw many girls of color with various hair types and hairstyles that were all considered acceptable. It made her more comfortable in her own hair.

When GR moved her daughter to a different school, she was glad to find that this school had several Black girls in the class as well. Her daughter began getting blowouts at a hair salon (i.e. straightening her hair) but had doubts about this style because she noticed that many of the other Black girls at school were not wearing their hair straight. She came home and told GR about her concerns. They discussed it, and now they often style her hair in curly styles.

Through this journey with her daughter as well as with her fourteen-year-old son, GR’s own perception of Black hair has developed.

“You just have to be happy with what grows out of your head, and that’s something that has taken me a while to see,” GR said. “I always thought there were certain hair textures that were better than others, but watching their hair journeys and how it’s taken them some time to be completely comfortable with their own hair [...] opened my eyes to a lot.”

Raising her children and nurturing their self-confidence and pride in themselves and their identities has helped GR unlearn some of the harmful ideas about Black hair taught to her when she was younger.

“I’m starting to rethink some of my own stereotypes that I’ve had about hair just watching my own children’s journey with it,” said GR.